How Did Twilight Become So Massive?
As far as key demographics go, I’m one of the most desirable for those in the entertainment biz to target. I am an 18–34 year old male. The other? Adolescent girls, anywhere between 12–19, and in this case, I’m going to extend the age range to 25, as some girls won’t give up the sparkly dream of Edward cooing them to bed.
This is the current hot shit. The third largest opening in cinematic history ($140.7 million) features a group of sparkly vampires and a girl that won’t give it up because the world will crumble under the weight of hot vampire whoopee.
As a male from the first demo, I have no interest in seeing these particular films, yet as a plucky writer of a pop culture column and a general know–it–all, I now know why Twilight works (thank you Internetz).
1: Girls love perfect/imperfect relationships. Edward is the perfect boy who loves the imperfect girl, making it the easiest transition to obsessive teenage behaviour since the Backstreet Boys circa 1999. He can’t have her. She can’t have him. But, they’re soooo in love...
2: Girls like sparkly bits. Make dreamy lead character sparkle in the sun. Girls fall for dreamy vampire boy and the sparkle theory stands.
3: Robert Pattinson. This is the luckiest motherfucker since Jonathan Taylor Thomas except he’s got a massive movie deal. Smartest move: silence. The less you say, the more they talk about you. Best story about him: a fan had 10 seconds with him and asked what she could do to make it memorable. He said, “Get naked.” She did. Well, she tried, until security hauled her off for being a half–naked nutbag...
4: Girls need this cheesy shit. Back to the demographics. 18–34 males want explosions and Nazi zombies. 12–25 year old females want to fall in love with sparkly vampires. It’s that simple.
Our Cities Will Never Figure Out Mass Transit
This issue is much more complicated than I have room for, so I’ll be brief. For light rail to work in this area, it needs to be connected to other light rail systems (GO, VIA Rail) to function with any sort of efficiency. If it’s merely a monorail shaped as a crescent moon, we’re screwed. There is too much area to cover. I can drive to Toronto in the same time it takes to get from Union Square to Etobicoke on a single streetcar.
